Dear Teddy Bear,
It’s been years since we met. I hope the shelf was comfortable enough for you to stay.
I know it is very ridiculous to write a letter to an ex-boyfriend, when it has been 7 years since we broke up, but you should know that I had to write this thing. I had to apologies what I had done to you 7 years ago.
It was one Christmas morning; I was so excited about the presents I woke up earlier than I usually do. Everybody in the house was asleep, so I came out of my bed room and tiptoed across the hallway to the Christmas tree. There laid many presents. You were in one of those boxes, yes, I can exactly remember the box you were inside; a large size box wrapped with sparkling green paper and a big red ribbon. I was too excited that my hands were shivering. It took me a while to get you out of that big green box. When I rescued you from the green box, you said “thank you, miss” with a grateful smile. That smile…! Your smile, beautiful and gorgeous, made me feel weird. It was a strange feeling, but not a bad one. I could not help myself from smiling back at you. Your blond fur was shinny enough to make me blind. Your chubby belly was way too cute. Your red t-shirt with your name “POOH” on it showed your sense of humor. I could feel my heart pumping because of the enthusiasm that I met a new friend.
We were always together. We ate together, shopped together, went to kindergarten together, and even slept together. I miss those times. Do you remember the day you asked me to go out with you? For me, the memory is too vivid that I can hardly believe that it has been more than 10 years ago. It was summer vacation of 1999, when our family lived in the US. Our family went on a trip to New York. The trip was fantastic, wasn’t it? It truly was a great time. After few days we came back home with great excitement; however, the excitement did not last for a long time. I noticed that you were not with me. I cried and cried and cried. You wouldn’t know how hopeless I felt. I called the hotel that we’ve stayed in New York. I was not good at English, but couldn’t wait for anymore seconds. Fortunately, the hotel people found you and sent me all the way from New York to Ohio. The day you arrived back to our sweet home, you asked me to go out. Pooh, my dear love Pooh, I have always been thinking of you as more than just a friend; I loved you so much and I trusted you more than anybody else. I would have to say sorry that it was me who broke our relationship. I was and am so sorry that I had an affair with another guy, Woody. There is nothing that I can say but sorry. I mistook you and made a deep scar in your heart.
I know I am being very selfish, but I want to go back to the days that we were good friends. These days, I live in a dormitory because of my school. All my roommates are kind and good, we always have fun together. Roommates, however, are not the exact same as a real “family”. I need somebody to tell my deepest stories. I need somebody to lean on when I am having hard times. You are trustful enough to tell my stories and you are family-like enough to make me feel comfortable.
My dear friend, I sincerely apologize what I have done in the past. Why don’t you come down the self and come to my desk. I miss you a lot. Good night my dear.
your love Jiyeon
Hi Jiyeon,
답글삭제You write really well, and this is very creative. Everyone has a toy they remember and love, and this captures that in a Toy Story kind of way. Very nice anecdotal account. Not sure about the "going out" and "cheated" thing as I discuss below, as I simply think there's a softer/cuter way to handle it.
Good grammar for the most part, and very few errors. The ones you do make seem due to oversight, so please proofread and watch verb tenses.
A good first assignment.
_________________
I had to APOLOGIZE FOR what I had done to you 7 years ago.
It was one Christmas morning; I was so excited about the presents THAT I woke up earlier than I usually do.
I was SO excited that my hands were shivering.
When I rescued you from the green box, you said "Thank you, miss!”with a grateful smile.
Your blond fur was SHINY enough to BLIND ME.
I could feel my heart pumping because of the enthusiasm I HAD FOR MEETING THIS NEW FRIEND.
For me, the memory is SO vivid that I can hardly believe that it WAS more than 10 years ago. It was THE summer vacation of 1999, when our family lived in the US.
After A few days we came back home with great excitement; however, the excitement did not last (DELETE) long (DELETE). I noticed (DELETE) you were not with me. I cried and cried and cried. You COULDN'T know how hopeless I felt. I called the hotel in NEW YORK WHERE WE stayed. I WASN'T good at English, but THIS WAS THE LAST THING ON MY MIND IN YOUR ABSENCE.
Fortunately, the hotel people found you and sent YOU all the way from New York to Ohio. The day you arrived back to our sweet home, you asked me to go out.
(I really love the playful cuteness you have going here, but I'm not sure the "go out" theme works - especially here. It sounds a bit jarring and abrupt. Reword it, or adjust it to "be yours again" or something similar. Just a suggestion.)
Pooh, my dear love Pooh, I have always THOUGHT of you as more than just a friend; I LOVE you so much and I TRUST you more than anybody else. I (DELETE) have to say sorry - FOR it was me who broke our relationship. I am so sorry that I had an affair with another guy, NAMED Woody. There is nothing that I can say but sorry. I TOOK YOU FOR GRANTED and made a deep scar in your heart.
(Again, not sure I am convinced that the adult nature of "affairs" and "going out" and "boyfriend" work well with a Pooh teddy-bear. A Ken doll might seem more plausible, and that would change the entire Ode. I know it's your Ode and maybe you did have a crush on Pooh, but I'm just being honest with my audience opinion. I really like everything else, but get stuck on the "cheated on my teddy-bear" aspect. But that's just me:).
I know I am being very selfish, but I want to go back to the days WHEN we were good friends. These days, I live in a dormitory because of my school. All my roommates are kind and good, AND we always have fun together. Roommates, however, are not the (DELETE) same as a real “family.” I need somebody to tell my deepest stories TO. I need somebody to lean on when I am having hard times. You are TRUSTWORTHY enough to TELL MY SECRETS TO, and you are FAMILIAL enough to make me feel comfortable.
My dear friend, POOH, I sincerely apologize FOR what I have done in the past. Why don’t you come down FROM the self and come to my desk. I miss you a lot. Good night my dear.